I'm Awesome (Prussia X Reader) (songfic)

Angry, nervous and pacing you walked around in your strapless black and red dress. Your heels were killing you and you were sick of your (h/c) hair covering your right breast. You have never had a blind date before, but your best friend, (bff's name here) set you up as she was sick of you being a loner at her parties. As she remembers, you've never gone out with any of the guys she sets you up with. As many times as you tell her that they are all asswipes, she doesn't listen. Sighing, you waited in your house re doing your hair like five times. You were so nervous, yet you didn't know why? 'He's just going to be another asshole.' You thought. 'I'll just leave after dinner.' You sighed softly looking out the window, your heart bumping. You looked at the clock. The date was supposed to start thirty minutes ago. You huffed angrily and started up the starts as a song was heard from coming outside.

I'm awesome
No you're not dude don't lie
I'm awesome
Driving 'round in my mom's ride
I'm awesome
Quarter of my life gone by and I met all my friends online.

Great, your so-called, "theme song" was on. So what if you drove in your mom's mini-van? It was comfortable and it got you around to point A to B. What more could you ask for? And you like facebook….who doesn't? You huffed again as you realized that was your cue to come outside. The car parked by your place as he slammed his door shut with the music playing.

Yeah my pants sagged low
Even though

"That style was over like 10 years ago." You huffed to yourself not believing that the man who was your date was sagging his pants as well.

I got the swagger of a cripple
Got little biceps gettin' fatter in the middle.

You looked at his body. Even though you couldn't see, you knew he was very fit. 'At least he's not a loser.' You thought. You grabbed your purse and walked out the door.
"WOW. YOU ARE HOT!" he yelled over the music. The neighbors lights went on as some walked out to complain and curse out. Embarressed, you walked to him and asked him to turn down the music.
"WHAT?!"
"I said…" you started a bit louder getting annoyed.
"WHAT?!" You're eye twitched in anger.
"TURN THE GOD DAMN MUSIC DOWN!" you yelled much to yours and his surprise. Normally you were a very quiet and well-mannered girl. Usually this was the reason that your friends called you boring. 'with love.'
He turned the music down and grinned.
"Hey, I am--"
"Late. You are very late."
"I had to fix my car." You frowned. This date was getting to a very bad start.

~☼~

The drive was bad enough, but now you had to eat dinner with him?! 'Maybe I should fake sick and go home.' You offered at the dinner table. He was the very opposite of you. He was loud, rude at times, cocky, and loud! So very loud. At dinner he just normally talked about himself, with the words consisting of 'awesome', 'incredible', and 'epic' after every other two words. You on the other hand, were quiet, liked small trips to the library and nature. Rubbing your temples, the main dish had arrived, a plate of lobster landed beside you. You thanked the waiter and began to eat. He had steak and some vegetables. You prayed to anyone in high power that he wasn't going to talk with his mouth full. Thankfully he didn't as you calmly ate your meal pretending to listen to him. He finished his meal rather quickly and stared at you oddly, as if he couldn't wait for you to finish. You dipped it in butter and stared back at him. There was an odd silence.
"It's quite rude to stare." You stated opening your mouth and biting the meat. His eyes glistened in excitement. Swallowing, you sipped your water. After a few more minutes you finished your food as he had already called for the check and rejected the offers the waiter gave. As you two walked out the door, you crossed your arms and stopped.

"What?!" he asked.

"Did you have somewhere to go?" you asked impatiently. He looked at you with a face that could have only said, "Duh."

"Yeah come on frau!" he said dragging you into the car. Much to your dismay, you were back on the road again.

~☼~
At your destination, you heard club music rattling the windows. The line wasn't too large but everything looked so filthy and grimy on the streets. You didn't even want to get out of the car.

"This….is where you wanted to take me?" you asked.  He nodded.

"Don't be like that frau. Come on you'll have fun." He said holding your hand in his. You blushed in shock as he hadn't tried to even touch you all day other than when he dragged you. Ignoring your conscience, you complied completely and joined him in the club. The music was loud, lights flashed everywhere in a rainbow of colors and for a moment you didn't know where you were for a minute. A girl with a half shirt on walking in a really tight mini skirt passed by, her skirt riding up after every step making you and Prussia look in amazement. You heard a distant, "Oh honhonhon!" somewhere. Scared out of your mind, you clung to Prussia's arms not daring to let go. He blushed at this as he felt your breasts cover his arm. You two walked down the flashing stairs onto the dance floor. Your eyes widened in horror.

"Dancing?" you shook your head.

"What?"

"I'm not really a good dancer…" you admitted looking down.

"That's alright, the awesome Prussia will help you!" he laughed guiding you down the dance floor and holding you in his arms. He smiled as he slowly helped you get your rhythm in as you two did some simple dance moves. Cracking a smile, you finally felt a little at ease as his hands trailed to your hands interlocking them softly. Thankful, that the dim lighting covered your face, you smiled brightly, he chuckled seeing that you were finally having fun. Spinning you, you swayed your hips softly getting closer to him as his hands abandoned yours and held your waist. At first you were about to object, but his hands didn't trail any farther than above or below the bellybutton you figured it was fine, for now. Dancing for about an hour you two stopped for a drink at the bar. He smiled pointing out different people dancing, he laughed as one man had struck out with a pretty brown haired girl. You couldn't help but to laugh as well, the poor man didn't have a chance. Soon you found yourself laughing at his jokes and his stories. You didn't know why, but all of a sudden you found him entertaining. Maybe it was the last two vodka and cranberries you had. Downing another one, you clumsily climbed down and giggled pulling on his white and black tie back to the dance floor.

"Um, ___ I think you had too much to drink." You laughed hiccuping and clung to him your hips connected to his grinding against his body. He grunted softly as you gyrated on him as you lowered yourself leaning back, holding his back to you so he couldn't escape. Many people near you nodded, clearly having a few drinks in them as well.
"Come on baby, dance wit' me." You slurred lightly reaching around and grabbing his butt.

"Ja, you had too much." You giggled and stuck your tongue out at him playfully. Suddenly your drunk mind came up with an idea. You ran up to the DJ and asked him to hand you the mic.

"Okay, Okay, okay! I wanna rap to you all!" you yelled. Everyone cheered. Prussia's eyes went wide.

"Ah, fick..." He desperately ran to the front of the crowd calling your name. He knew that your friend was going to kill you if you got hurt.

"Now, this is my first time, but my date here, said I should try new things! So I did! I tried a vodka and cranberry and dancing at a club and shit! And it's fuckin' awesome!" You laughed into the mic. Prussia ran up to the stage gesturing you to get down from the stage as the crowd cheered. You nodded for the DJ to play. The song began as you smiled. "My friends say this is my theme song!" you laughed. "So (bff name) FUCK YOU I'M SINGING IT! IT'S YOUR THEME SONG NOW I'M MORE FUN THAN YOU! MUTHA FUCKER I'M AWESOME!"

"NO YOU'RE NOT DUDE DON'T LIE!" the crowd joined in!

"I'm awesome! Driving 'round in my mom's ride! I'm awesome quarter of my life gone by and I met all my friends online mother fucker…"

"I'M AWESOME"

"I will run away from a brawl!"

"I'm awesome."

"There's no voice mail nobody called!"

"I'm awesome!" You pointed to your date and smirked as the light went to him.

"Can't afford to buy eight balls and he messages himself on his face book wall!" Everyone laughed and ooohed. Accepting it, he sighed as he got up on the stage and took the mic off the stand and pulled his pants up. 'Might as well.' he thought.

"Yeah you know my pants sag low, even though, that went out of style like 10 years ago!"

"Spose!"

"I got the swagger of a cripple got little biceps getting fatter in the middle." He rapped taking off his shirt as the girls screamed. You blushed and inched closer slightly wobbling over to him in drunk jealously. Before he could finish his line you kissed him as the music played as the crowd went wild as he kissed back not denying the sparks you two had. He held your waist tasting the alcohol in your mouth as he bit your lip softly making you moan as you held his body. You two finally parted in time to finish the song now holding each other's waist.

"Furthermore, I'm cornier than ethanol, cheesier than provolone
I spent ages eight to ten living in a motor home
With an ego the size of Tim Duncan
Even though I got shit for brains like a blumpkin

I'm twenty-four serving lobster rolls
Because I spent a decade filling Optimals
And I'm not even the bomb in Maine
On my game, I'm only about as sexy as John McCain

Now put your hands up if you have nightmares
If you wouldn't man-up if there was a fight here
If you got dandruff, if you drink light beer"

"I'm out of breath." Complete silence.

"I'm awesome, no, you're not, dude, don't lie
I'm awesome, I'm drivin' around in my mom's ride
I'm awesome, a quarter of my life gone by
And I met all my friends online

Motherfucker, I'm awesome, I will run away from a brawl
I'm awesome, there's no voicemail, nobody called
I'm awesome, I can't afford to buy eight-balls
And I talk to myself on my Facebook wall

I'm awesome!"   

At that you kissed again, as he picked you up walking through the crowd of people who had parted for you to walk to his car and drive home. When he got back to your house, he grabbed you and took your lips pushing through the door, no longer denying the attraction and desire as he carried you to the bedroom where he made you feel "awesome" all night.

~☼~

You woke up cuddling in Prussia's arms remembering his "five meters" penetrating you over and over again. Your body ached looking at your dates sleeping face holding your bare body softly to his. One thing was for sure: You could never be called boring again.